How did this western societal idea of how a man should act, and what emotions are appropriate to show come about? How far back in western history does this idea of limiting men’s ability to emote honestly go? And how did these ideas change over time?
It’s interesting to me because I feel like these traditional and limited roles that western society puts on men (and women) are just that traditions. That it’s just something “that we do because past generations did them.” So my curiosity is why did past generations have these societal rules in place? was there a legitimate reason for it, did having men be almost robotic even in the privacy of his home and around his family have some necessary and important reason? If so is that still necessary today?
Edit: had this posted on c/asklemmy but it was suggested this was a better place for this question.
Man, you need a full on historian for this, but I’ll try.
Iirc, the whole stoicism thing started in Ancient Greece, but there’s probably earlier instances of it. It waned and waxed throughout the centuries, growing stronger sometimes and growing weaker others. The current way of it is basically from the protestant way of thinking combined with various wars, like WW1. I seriously hope you go reading stuff outside of Lemmy, I haven’t studied this stuff in over a decade.
Now, for a non-western perspective, the east has a similar concept in Bhuddism, and it’s just as old as western stoicism.
Iirc, there was also some Indian tribe (Cherokee?) that also made a big deal of it. I can’t speak much on it.
For the record, stoicism is not about being a robot, it’s about being emotional stable. There’s a massive difference.
You’re conflating Patriarchal gender roles with Stoicism. They are not the same thing and Stoicism is not what OP is asking about.
OP literally asked “what emotions are appropriate to show come about? How far back in western history does this idea of limiting men’s ability to emote honestly go”
That sounds a lot like stoicism to me.
The reason I used robotic instead of stoic in my initial post is that I see stoicism as less about refraining from emotions but learning how to control emotions. That is recognize that you are human and you will have a wide variety of emotions, and you should have all of those emotions. But with stoicism the goal is to recognize the emotion you are having and not allow it to control you.
You can be mad or even fucking piss off angry but you should still have that higher, separate thought that control the emotion and allow it to come out in ways that don’t create a negative impact on yourself and others.
My post was more about where in history did the western culture evolve to punish men from having any emotion beyond anger, ambivalence and to a limited degree humor.
When my life turned upside down and a lot of shit happened I got interested in Stoicism to the point I even read a bit of Seneca.
I never felt it as a way to be emotionless or a way to hide or suppress emotions , but rather as a way to just accept my them and “yeah, I see and acknowledge I feel like crap, no need to go crazy about it” (in my situation). It brought an understanding to me that not everything that happens is about me personally and I stop fighting what I can’t change to put my focus where I can have an influence.
Warning: this is not a definition of stoicism, but what I took away from it for myself.
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OP, this user is a straight-up fascist so you may look to their answer for some pseudohistory and an example of fragile masculinity, but I wouldn’t believe anything they claim is true.
This is Reddit-tier behavior. Love how you don’t talk about any of his reply, or have any rebuttals - but literally just go through his history and attack him personally instead of focusing on what was said.
I told OP that it was pseudohistorical nonsense, get off your high horse.
Dude constantly posts about how racist he is and you expect me to leave him be? Fuck off. This place isn’t gonna be a Nazi bar like Reddit.
Go touch grass dude. When you’re just following people around harassing them on the internet, it’s time to go out and get some fresh air.
Oh no, some lillyliver thinks I need to go outside.
What ever will I do? Excuse me, I must retire to my fainting couch.
But I don’t think I’ll play nice with the fascists when I see them around, so block me if that bothers you.
And this user is a liar and a creep. He makes shit up about other people because they disagree with him., and then he follows them around because he got obsessed with them.
And for the record, I added a disclaimer that he needs to do his own research outside of lemmy.
You’re so self-absorbed that you think I follow you?
That’s adorable.