Enthusiastic sh.it.head

  • 5 Posts
  • 298 Comments
Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 9th, 2023

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  • I’d say if you understand that if it gets serious, you will find yourself in a parental role of some kind (specific degree varies situation to situation), and accept that as a something you will step up to as necessary, go for it.

    I was a dumb-as-rocks 20 year old when I met my ex-wife and her kid. Now my marriage is over, but I am that kid’s de facto dad and that’s pretty much a ‘for life’ thing. I don’t regret that and they are the most important human in my life, and I like to think I did a decent enough job helping raise them (no worse than my own young parents, at least). But if I had a time machine, I can’t say I wouldn’t go back and ask young Cracks if he really understands what he’s getting into.

    That said, circumstances could have been such that the dynamic was different (older kid at time of arrival, more involved biodad, etc.), so YMMV. But regardless, people with kids are a package deal, and that needs to be seriously considered when dating/getting into a relationship. If that doesn’t line up with what you want out of life, there’s absolutely no shame in that.








  • Pretty much repeating what’s been said here, but a) how does she actually use it beyond her own posting behaviour, and b) who is she talking to?

    If she literally just posts random crap on her feed and talks only to kin, a concentrated effort to move family to something like Friendica might be a useful project. If she’s interacting with a wider network of friends/acquaintances, community/hobbyist groups, news outlets (you can do that in the States, can’t do it in Canada anymore), Facebook games, and various slop vectors, you have a much more challenging task on your hands.

    There’s a lot of shit on Facebook that’s hard to replace in a way people who otherwise don’t care about Meta would use. If you’re looking to start anywhere, I’d say start setting up a Friendica instance, have a plan to onboard key family members with the least amount of friction possible, seed your own feed with grandma bait, and keep bringing it up (“Oh yeah, [x] was great, I took a lot of pictures, here’s the link to my Friendica page. Oh, you need an account? It’s just your e-mail, password’s GrammyGram@420. I’ll show you how to change it*.”)

    *Not a Friendica user so I dunno how it works in detail, but you get the idea. Also doesn’t need to be Friendica specifically, but this one’s usually brought up when talking Facebook alternatives specifically.





  • This was more or less my response when looking at the question. If it’s an unhealthy, hyperfocus escape, then it’s kinda sad. But just a fun thing that you enjoy spending time doing with the other life stuff in check? Not sad, go nuts.

    Waaay back in the day when I lived in a little fishing village, we had a community falling domino guy. He lived with his mom, and my family had reason to stop by his house to pick some stuff up once. The whole scene struck child me as kinda sad. But taking a step back: the guy had something he really enjoyed, he brought it to the broader community for them to enjoy pretty often, and he had a place of note in the local community through that. Took away quite a bit of my initial impression.



  • Unfortunately, yeah. Re: point one - I’d be absolutely shocked if there isn’t such an instance already, or if the activity isn’t being scraped direct from ActivityPub via some other methods.

    Re: point two … idk man, I’m one of those idiots that still has Facebook at the moment, and I’ve seen some shit that makes me suspicious (though whether that’s based on my lemmy activity or any one of a number of other leaky things is anyone’s guess).

    I simply don’t know enough to state anything with confidence, but know your Lemmy activity (generally speaking) is very, very public. Anyone want to chime in and call me an idiot (re: this topic, otherwise I already know) with examples? It’d be deeply reassuring :)