Probably need to look for less than a short. Water is conductive but not THAT conductive.

What are you printing so much of that requires a nuts and bolts drawer? I want in!

I’ve also used VoIP.ms. Making and receiving calls is possible but requires setting up a SIP client app on your phone. Getting the settings right can be tricky.

Damn dude, who beat the shit out of you, took all your stuff and banged “your” women?

Not if they wanted loyal tribesmen companions. And not if they wanted to avoid being killed in their sleep.

As a default, a spouse and kids will rope you into decades of regular social interaction.

Look into fixed wireless or 4G/5G home internet. Fixed wireless is sometimes exactly what you need in spots like that. It is not 4G or 5G, sometimes it is just long range WiFi or other lax spectrum.