aka: Burglary of your home, Car break-in, Your bedroom getting searched by someone (Parents/Roomates/Housemates/ or even Burglars), Your Backpack, Personal Electronics/Phone/Computer/etc getting searched, etc. (Including any seaches by law enforcrment / security)
Basically, anything that can be considered “personal space”.
Why I ask?
Well… My parent’s car has signs of being searched through last night, I think they forgot to close the windows all the way, and some random thief got in and looking for valuables, nothing of value wa taken, but stuff were all over the car, now I hate the idea of getting into that car again (someone might’ve slept inside the car, blegh 😖). That car feels so “tainted” now.
Like this cant be only my feeling right? Like, you just feel disgusted after someone touch your things against your will (especially if they are strangers).
Closest I’ve ever had is probably my dad searching my room for candy when I was younger or may be a year or so ago I went to see summer fireworks and came home to find out he went into my room and went into my electronic junk/storage dresser drawer and snagged some cookies I planned on eating when I got back later that night. I’m not super pissed about it since they were for my mom, but I’m not happy about it either, even to this day.
As for the other incidents of candy snagging when I was younger, I can’t remember anything specific so I don’t feel anything about them.
we had a burglary once. the guy came in the back door while my wife was showering. took her bag, my laptop and a few other things and went back outside. tried to take the car but the key he had semi-miraculously had a damaged chip in it cause it went through the dryer so it wouldnt start. he pushed it down the street trying to start it and couldnt. when we found it the drivers seat and passenger seat were covered with what seemed like dog hair. the cops had to come take it to search it for fingerprints or whatever. we found my wife’s bag down the street having been thrown into the stream. she still has the bag, vacuumed the car out and wiped it down, all good.
another time, i was living in this shared house that had a very serious reputation for having tons of parties with all kinds of drug use. several people were selling out of there (i didnt know at the time). I came home one day to find all of my drawers dumped onto the ground, mattress flipped over etc etc. The cops had come in with their dogs and flipped the whole house. cops standing on my bed in their filthy boots. broken ceramic mugs. i had nothing to do with it and they didnt find anything in my room.
the cop thing was just weird. but, after the burglary, i was paranoid for a good long while, months and months. it goes away after a time. we beefed up security significantly.
the tainted thing youre talking about though, this is psychological of course. theres nothing wrong with the car. people go through shit at airport security and things, it doesnt taint anything. this is a violation of your privacy, sure, but not your personhood. autonomy and personal space is just a concept. deer and cows and foxes and wolves and swarms of insects and people have been in the space that your house currently occupies. its just a spot on the planet some temporary walls have been put up to keep you dry. your house wont be there forever, thats a fact. later, someone something else will live where you house was. their space wasnt tainted by your presence.
just food for thought. if you have a therapist Id suggest mentioning it to them, it can help to talk about it. it almost feels like this about something else that this is a metaphor for, but you’d know if that feels true or not.
anyway, it’ll pass. it happens to everyone.
My parents felt the need to occasionally sack my room for drugs, and of course, me not having any drugs around my room usually meant they didn’t find any drugs.
They never thought to look in the PlayStation 2 expansion bay.
I’m DEA Agent Hank Schrader, OPEN THE FCK UP!
🔫
“go way, batin!”
I had my car searched at school after the drug dogs hit on the Claritin D in my front seat. I was more pissed than anything (partly because they picked flakes of “weed” out of my floorboards with tweezers and sent me to alternative school for 19 weeks).
Drug dogs are total bullshit, too. They’re just theatre to let cops search wherever they want.
It wasn’t even a cop, it was a private company. I knew there wasn’t weed in the car because I had moved it into my room that morning.
Lmao
Wow, same thing happened to me 20 years ago in Texas. I was suspended for a seed they found in the ashtray.
They were making an example of me, even though the school handbook (which is what they legally have to follow) said the max was 6 weeks. I couldn’t go to my senior prom because it would have been criminal trespassing.
The best part is that we were appealing the decision, and right before our school board meeting my mom got a call saying that if we didn’t stop appealing, the flakes of weed would turn into 2oz (felony).
Oh, I forgot. The husband of the wife who made the threat, who was one of the school board members and hated me, was the person who’s hand I had to shake to get my diploma. (they also tried to prevent me from walking)
But yeah, gotta love small town texas.
Reminds me of this local legend: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H66WuRtzI0M&t=25
He quotes Home Improvements (which was pretty succesful show here for some reason) saying “I don’t think so Tim”. That teacher was apparently huge asshole.
Had a landlord that I discovered had been in my apartment without letting me know. Luckily, tenants have quite good legal protections where I’m from. Among other things, we can have the lock changed by a locksmith and bill the landlord for it if they’ve done just that. So I sent them an email with the contact info for a local locksmith, along with the legal text saying I could do just that, and let them know they had burned through any goodwill with their first infraction (which I documented). They apologised and didn’t do it again.
Lol that landlord is an idiot. If they had a more aggressive tenant, the tenants could’ve just claim they are missing items and blame the landlord for it, or if they are at home at the time, even use lethal force and claim self defence (and probably gotten off any charges).
What a fucking idiot, the landlord is lucky someone didn’t mistake them for a burglar/home invader.
Probably depends on country, but where I’m from, you can’t use lethal force unless there’s danger to “life or health”, that is, you can’t use lethal force against a home invader unless it’s absolutely necessary.
Besides, the most lethal weapon in most peoples homes are the fire extinguisher and kitchen knives.
To be frank: You would never get away with killing a landlord that locked themselves into your apartment while you were home, unless they tried to harm you in some way. Not a burglar either for that matter.
Disclaimer: Obviously, if you confront a burglar, and it develops to a violent confrontation, lethal force can be justified. However, you will be hard pressed on whether you had the option to remove yourself from the situation before needing to resort to lethal force.
Oh, I’m in the USA, and people here can just willy-nilly shoot people, and you’d get away with it most of the time. (unless the person you shot is a cop, in which case you’re fucked, even if you genuinely thought they were a home invader)
Edit: Well it also depends on if the landlord was an individual “mom&pop” landlord, or someone with like 100 units. If its one of the “richer” landlords, I could see there being more investigations into the shooting. A shooting of those “poorer” landlords would just get swept under the rug. But I don’t know why someone with 100+ units would be managing properties by themselves, so the tenant in this hypothetical situation would almost be guaranteed to walk free, since the landlord would almost be guaranteed to be not “rich enough” to warrant the attention of the authorities.
In California we follow our version of castle doctrine:
198.5. Any person using force intended or likely to cause death or great bodily injury within his or her residence shall be presumed to have held a reasonable fear of imminent peril of death or great bodily injury to self, family, or a member of the household when that force is used against another person, not a member of the family or household, who unlawfully and forcibly enters or has unlawfully and forcibly entered the residence and the person using the force knew or had reason to believe that an unlawful and forcible entry occurred. As used in this section, great bodily injury means a significant or substantial physical injury.
Now, you can do what you need to do to protect yourself, but then you get to explain to the cops and possibly a judge what happened, and you better hope they agree with you. It’s also important to note that this doesn’t extend to someone intruding on your exterior property, just someone who breaks into your house, and you do have to have reason to believe they will harm you or your family.
Housemates left a door open; we lived in the woods.
A squirrel got into the house. Housemates, because young men are idiots, chased the squirrel further into the house… right into my bedroom.
They then tossed literally all of my possessions around the room in an attempt to remove or kill the squirrel.
Friends, they were not successful. The squirrel escaped the room and ran further into the house.
About a year ago some tried to break into my flat at 2am. I was alone that night. They didn’t get in because I put the chain in front of the door. The following nights I always locked the door, left the key in the lock and turned to the rightmost position, put the chain on, and moved a shelf in front of it. And whenever my roomies are gone for a couple of days, I’ll lock the door. So yeah. You are not alone in this. Your feeling of safety has been challenged and that “tainted” feeling will linger for a while. I guess it’s our survival instinct trying to warn us that we may not be safe. But it will get better with time.
these are awesome. have some without alarm too
When I moved out at 18 I was sitting on my parents front porch waiting for my ride and my mom came out and started rooting through all my stuff. Destroyed the dried flowers my boyfriend gave me for prom, took anything she decided I wasn’t allowed to have because she paid for, broke a few other sentimental things while screaming. I just sat back and let her. Didn’t say a word. I had an eerie calm about me because I was leaving and she wouldn’t have any power over me anymore.
My mum felt entitled to go through any and all of my things the entire time I lived with her. Never had privacy until after I moved out. I’m pretty fucked up, mental health wise.
Hell yes. I’m a person who always valued my own privacy, but I didn’t have much, especially during university plus almost ten years afterwards.
I lived with my brother in his tiny apartment, and my mom was most of the time living there too. My mom is a very nosy person, and it happened sometimes that I got home to seeing my personal belongings being re-arranged, some missing.
Sometimes she would just open my cabinet right in front of me and search for something in there like it’s second nature, without even asking.
It was extremely infuriating and humiliating to me. And I feel so lucky and so peaceful now that I have my own apartment.
two breakins to my vehicle.
first time I was the idiot and left my window down and someone stole my 100 CD binder full of CDs. jokes on them, I had them all ripped to my PC anyway.
second time, someone broke into my toolbox and stole $2000 worth of tools in 5 minutes without me knowing until the next day.
I knew exactly where it happened because I had never been to that place and got lost. got a couple friends together and went back the next night, and sure enough I noticed a sketchy van with a dude in it.
I was the bait in my truck again and stopped, walked away and two dudes got out of the van and walked to my truck.
they didn’t know two of my friends were laying in the bed with wrecking bars.
I heard shouts before I got inside the store and came running back. When I got there one dude was on the ground blood pouring out his leg and his foot is kinked unusually.
the other dude was begging for us to let him go. I grabbed a framing hammer out of the cab and broke his wrist.
we then proceeded to absolutely fuck the entire van up. wasn’t even drivable anymore. flat tires, no lights, no windows, back doors bent and hanging.
I went back to the guys and told them to give me their cash. They gave me $50. I asked if this is all they got from my $2k in tools they stole the other day. they just sat there.
So I walked over, poured lighter fluid in their seats and set the van on fire.
when we left I threatened them if I ever saw them I would finish it.
drove home, got some beers and drank with the guys for the night.
do not fuck with a carpenters tools. it’s how they make their living. I was in a bad spot at the time, and most of those tools I had inherited from my father. they were more than tools to me.
no tools, no work, no work makes Jack a very bad boy. fuck thieves. I still don’t feel bad.
And then everyone clapped
I asked if this is all they got from my $2k in tools they stole the other day. they just sat there.
You vigilanted different guys.
A roommate’s girlfriend rummaged through my drawers and took some small bills and change from my dresser. My roommate sided with her, saying it wasn’t a big deal.
Our friendship soured, I got a new lock for my room that only I had a key to, and I set up a security camera on my desk. She never did do it again after being caught, but it made the rest of the time I lived there not particularly pleasant. I always felt slightly on edge, keeping an eye to make sure nothing had been moved or taken.
Fucking twice have I had basically all my belongings tossed out by someone else.
When I was 19, I went to work on a cruise ship for 5 months. When I came back, my parents had sold or trashed literally everything I owned except for my bed, my desk and chair, and my computer. All my books, all my toys, collectibles, games and consoles, all the posters on my wall… Gone.
I got married at 32 and my wife did the same fucking thing (not through divorce, either).
I’ve had things stolen from me from time to time by strangers; none of them hurt as much as having literally everything you own taken by your own family.
My old family home got burgled back in high school. Some things of value were stolen, though luckily nothing sentimental.
What was worth more than the stolen money was that I no longer felt safe in my own home. I couldn’t sleep well for a long time after that. I felt like I was sleeping out in the open. Sometimes I would hear a noise and jolt up and spend a whole hour trying to see if I could spot something weird on the camera feed (we installed CCTV).
When I was in middle school thieves broke into our house and robbed us. They got some of my dad’s guns and some of my mom’s jewelry. The jewelry hit her hard because it included things her father has given her.
When I was in college I had an amcient, yellow VW rabbit that got broken into a few times. The vent windows had hardware that was just glued to the glass, so you could just wedge something in and pop the glass out. Each time they’d rummage through it looking for valuables. It had to be someone who was a complete moron because I don’t know how else they could imagine someone driving a $50 VW had anything of value.
Eventually we replaced the vent windows with windows from a newer model that had the hardware bolted on and it stopped happening.
Someone also stole the antenna off it when it was parked once. I hope that bastard died slowly of malignant ass cancer that just ate him from the bottom up. The closest thing to nice about that car was being able to listen to the radio, and that son of a bitch took that way from me.
