Coworker. I told him to fuck off with his conspiracy bullshit. But back when I patronized him, one thing he said was that he didn’t consider belief a binary as in that you either believe something or don’t. He viewed all beliefs as a continuum. You can believe one thing 10% and another thing 90%, but he wouldn’t let me pin him down as to whether he “believed” any particular thing or not.
All while trying to convince me “tall white aliens” run the U.S. government and Sandy Hook was faked by a bunch of actors and the U.S. military had invisibility technology and planes that aren’t dumping weather-controlling chemicals don’t leave trails in the sky. Pretty standard QAnon-level bullshit. But if I asked him if he believed any of those things, he wouldn’t answer. Honestly, it makes sense as a dishonest rhetorical tactic.
Dude also literally drinks borax in his juice cleanse drink.
This one is gomna break you brains:
Y’all heard of the “Great Replacement” unhinged conspiracy theory?
Imagine that, but Han Chinese Edition.
Context: My family was born in PRC
My older brother told me the CCP is conspiring to… wait for it
Replace Han Chinese with ethnic minorities and “African Migrants”… 🤨
Yea his brain is totally cooked.
Might be lead poisoning or some other weird shit in China.
He hates racism, yet simultaneously believes in a racial hierarchy. 🤨
(of course, he believes Han Chinese are on top 🤨)
Oh did I forget to say, we live in the US.
Why is he so worried about China, a country he no longer has citizenship in… 🤨
He believes in Han Supremacy but became a US Citizen? 🤨
(Sorry for the 🤨 emoji, its just so… bewildering)
Also, doesn’t like vaccines, but still caved in and got a tetnaus vaccine when he stepped on a nail. Yes he know its a vaccine, but apparantly, if your risk of dying is high enough, survival instincts overrules conspiracy theories? 🤔
Two weeks ago.
California’s reservoirs are empty and couldn’t fight the fires because of democrats.
You can log into a website to see the realtime water levels. They are nearly full and have been. They are also above average levels.
My neighbor told me I was gonna die in 1year after getting the first round of COVID vaccines. Pff. I wish! Still here unfortunately.
Jesus christ, where do I even begin? I have parents who are conspiracy nuts, so this’ll be quite a list. There’s a difference between my mom, step dad, and oldest little brother, though, as two of them believe in more occult crap.
Well, here we go…
- Chemtrails. Also HAARP. For some reason “they” are constantly trying to control the weather. Somehow it involves better controlling the population. There was also the idea that Chemtrails seeded clouds to then rain chemicals onto people that’ll keep them complacent and controlled.
- During the Syrian mass immigration crisis; “they” are trying to replace us with a more complacent population to control us better.
- Vaccines are a scam to create a more complacent population, or is a means of population control, or is transhumanism and transhumanism is bad.
- By extention, COVID-19 exists only as a scare tactic. A frightened, scared population is a complacent population more easily controlled.
- Global warming is a scare tactic, and same as COVID-19, exists only keep the population scared and complacent.
- Most wars, especially the “war on terrorism” by George W. Bush, is a scare tactic… Yadda yadda complacent, controlled, etc…
- NATO is an expansionist, imperialist organisation to consolidate all power in one place for better control. It forces members to join it either through coercion or passive aggressive pressure. Russia only defending itself.
- The military (which military?) has far more advanced technology than what’s available to the public. Such as anti-gravity drones and thought suppression antennas.
- Every action, event, political decision, election, or organisation is always caused by a shadowy group of people who are the ones really in control of everything. A shadow government. They control truly everything, and their actions are done in order… To… Control… Everything… Yeah, not a really thought out one, this one is. But the basis for all the other conspiracies, and the “they” or “them” always refers to this.
- The Rothschild family is part of “them”, the most powerful family in all of history! (probably forgot about the Hapsburgs).
- They will never give true medicine to the world, as a means of keeping the population controlled. All medicine exists to keep you reliant on them.
- Homeopathy is the medicine “they” don’t want you to use.
- “They” are hoarding ancient, advanced technology.
- “They” are suppressing archeology, in case any “true” history comes to light, such as those involving highly advanced precursor races.
- The Smithsonian museum is hiding skeletons and archaeological findings that don’t fit with “established, mainstream archeology”, such as skeletons of a giant, highly advanced precursor race. Yes, they like David Icke. How could you tell?
- There are ways of generating free energy that “they” don’t want you to know, but ancient civilisations did. Such as the Egyptians who built pyramids as huge power plants. They’re either plasma fusion plants, pizo-electric generators producing energy from Earth’s vibrations, or some kind of funny triangular rock that in its exact configuration can generate power from the Earth’s lay-lines.
There’s probably a lot more, but I’m tired of typing all this out.
Some of these have been around for a while or remind me of some, my crunchy new-age grandparents were hardcore into the NWO order stuff. Some others I recall
- NWO stuff: North America would become the North American Union and forcefully adopt the Amero as currency. This was the pretext for the eventual merging of the EU and NAU to start total domination, pretty sure the UN was involved in this one.
- Stargates are real and the the US has bases on the moon as well as Mars
- Some water alignment thing, that you can put a logogram or something under a glass of water and that changes its properties to be better (‽??)
- The Philadelphia Experiment
- Roswell is responsible for technological leaps, and the powers that be have been slowly releasing things to evade suspicion
- Mayan calendar stuff
- Hardcore distrust of medical doctors and hospitals
- Fluoride - mind control, it’s a neuro toxin!
There’s others but those stick out.
Oh yeah, my parents certainly believe Stargate is created by artists trying casually reveal “the truth”, not in a literal sense, but one that is very open to interpretation. Somehow (and especially to my mom) if some artist, like a singer or a writer, creates something that is adjacent to her beliefs she’ll feel validated about them.
The tech being drip-fed into the public is also one, connected directly to the one where “the military” has super advanced technology.
And same with water. My parents already believe in homeopathy, and everything that comes with it. So water has a special “memory” that can somehow be imprinted and change its properties. Same goes with influencing water with sound or light.
And of course, they have INSANE distrust for doctors. Or literally anyone in a professional position. I think, with their beliefs, if you’re in a professional position you’re part of the system that hides and lies to the population, a mandate of “them” in control, to keep everyone stupid and complacent. So anyone in a professional position is an enemy, a malicious entity out to get you.
Electricity from nuclear power plants is radioactive and that’s why people get cancer.
I read a lof of conspiracy nutcakery for entertainment, this one is new to me. Thanks!
I suppose it is made of beta particles.
A440 was developed by the Nazis because it is harmonically dissonant and causes disorder and chaos as it is incongruous with people’s natural frequency. A432 is the ‘natural’ tuning system.
As someone who went to college for music theory, it was hilarious hearing this
Yeah, I remember when my step dad has a period he believed this. He would find ways to tune music back to how it’s “supposed” to sound. Everything sounded horribly out of tune, but he’d just say it’s because we’ve all become so used to listening to music the “bad” way.
For those of us that aren’t attuned, what’s the real answer? Lol
People don’t have a “natural frequency” is the real answer.
Well you’re wrong. A440 is the Nazi Reich frequency, and in response, the globohomo Jewish elites developed A432 to vibrationally enslave the goyim. It’s obvious that we must revert to Renaissance tuning and just temperament A415 to undo the cancer caused by modernity
Too darn many. Some of the family close to me has ignored their neurological decline for years. when I was a kid they used to drag me along to all sorts of crowds. It was quite the cluster####.
One that I debunked myself: one lady told me that I’d be drinking by the time I was 19. I proved her wrong, and I now realise what she did. I messaged her years later as we agreed to I would, but she did not remember me.
I now realise what she did.
What did she do?
She got me to stay away from alcohol for a long long time. I still think I’d have regardless, but I appreciate the effort
Reverse Psychology
I have one some say is interesting.
There’s this author I’ve enjoyed, in a way where you could call her an idol of mine. She wrote a few books I liked and I knew she went by a certain name and so I looked her up in a user directory based on this just as a way to entertain myself. Sent a request to be friends. The response was “request sent” and I was like “hehehehe, there’s a really small chance that’s her”.
A week later I got a response and almost shat myself. But we talked and talked and soon she invited me to a few of her social circles. I accepted. And… one of them is a flat earther club.
I definitely don’t mind and don’t judge. We’re still strong friends, we talk every day, and I’m a VIP in their social circle (I feel honored), but she’s big on that stuff and there’s a big discussion every now and then on the shape of the Earth, and it’s an… interesting experience. So I just sit on the sidelines as the one woman who silently disagrees with the Earth being flat.
It’s concave.it’s concavelmao this really got me.
A friend of mine was a Nazi and believed that Jews controlled lots of stuff. He believed that they were trying to destroy white people through race mixing and therefore made the country take in more immigrants. He’s getting treatment in prison now.
I got a Nazi friend too, believes all that whacky shit. The whackiest conspiracy theory that he believes is that his brown ass is Aryan and that Hitler wouldn’t have killed him if given the chance.
Weird that you have Nazi friends. I have idiot friends, but no Nazis.
Yeah, if i found a friend was a nazi, I would have 1 less friend.
I mean, that’s pretty much where I’m at. Probably should have specified that my friend became a Nazi, not the other way around.
And is now an ex-friend?
Your coworker may have small testicles.
Sorry. I tried to find out what would happen if you swallowed borax. There are several other reasons not to, but I couldn’t stop picturing a conspiracy theorist talking about chemtrails and taking a sip of ball shrinking juice. Maybe he even thinks that it’s from chemicals in the tap water and therefore increases his borax dose.
I’m afraid of chemicals “they” put up there, so I will drink chemical to counter act? Is that what people are doing?
Yup. Detoxing is necessary and totally works. Your liver and kidneys do absolutely nothing and are just there to fill up space. But remember that we are only allowed to say that something contains chemicals if we dislike it.
Installed Internet for this dude who was saying all kinds of crazy shit. The craziest was that he was in a famous rock band during the 80’s and the government forced them to break up because their lyrics were female-positive and also included “top secret” information about the Star Wars program, which his own dad apparently worked on (along with how they actually have nukes and lasers in space to defend against the aliens).
When I finally was done with the job, I looked up the band he said he was in. No such band ever existed. The closest thing I could find to the name he gave me (which I’ve forgotten now) was some German techno band that was only formed like 3 years before I had looked it up. The least he could have done was actually use an actual band name that existed in the 80’s. lol
Clearly you couldn’t find the band because the government wiped any record of such a dangerous group \s.
When I was a kid I would see the magazines with headlines like, “Hillary Clinton gives birth to Bat Boy.” I always wondered how they stayed in business; surely even the people buying them for a laugh were a tiny market.
Then I had a lot of jobs that put me at others’ homes and I understood very quickly. Fixing computers, painting walls, census taking, even roofing. People that seem normal out in public seem to feel safe revealing their beliefs when they’re on their own turf, especially when they have a captive audience.
In the US, at least, it’s a frightening amount of people who believe in the really out-there stuff.
There’s new conspiracy theories popping up;
The issue with conspiracy theories nowadays though, is stigma. There are plenty of people who tell me that there’s super evil conspiracies. But calling those conspiracies makes people upset.
And not because their ideas are always unreasonable. It’s just the stigma as far as I can tell
Just the other day my friend told me that if I put TikTok on my phone the Chinese government will connect my phone to all my other devices and accounts so they can get my juicy data.
They could skip all that and just pay for it from the THOUSANDS of companies trying to compile a “marketing” dossier on every human alive.
Edit: So that have your data, what do they think the next step is, blackmail? Our government will be throwing you in camps for gay thought crimes soon. What can china do from way over there?
Yeah we all know they already have all of our juicy data
I have a coworker that believes every single conspiracy theory out there. Thankfully he doesn’t vote. I’ve only talked to the guy a couple times tho, so I can’t remember any of the specifics.